Brandie and Mary's Oldies
LOOK! THERE ARE SONGS WITH OUR NAMES IN THEM!
Top Ten Oldies (not yet finalized - in other words, we're very fickle)
- Love Potion #9, by the Clovers
-----This song was one of the only two on both of our lists. It is just a fun, fun song, involving magic, chugging, and kissing odd objects. It also made in to a cheesy movie from the 80's with Sandra Bullock. But we still like the song. Thanks to Mike Bozzo for discovering the artist of this song for us!
- American Pie, by Don Mclean
-----Not only is this a GREAT song commemorating Buddy Holly's death, but it is sacred to those of us who have attended CTY (Cult for Twisted Youth) It is well known by all ages, and has many paradies. These can be found on Brendon's American Pie Page. Be especially sure to check out the Star Wars version...you'll never listen to the song in the same way again.
- Beep Beep by the Playmates
-----This song is fun, simple, and makes absolutely no sense. It is about a car race between a Cadillac (HEFTY HEFTY!) and a Nash Rambler (wimpy wimpy!). The lyrics read "I'll show him that a cadillac is not a car to scorn. Beep beep. Beep beep. His horn went beep beep beep." This song gradually speeds up as the song goes on. Hard to dance to (we recommend the can-can. Just remember to do it in a wide open space), but FUN! Again, thanks to Mike Bozzo for correcting we of feeble minds (Brandie. Mary knew it all the time... *dramatic pause while Brandie smacks Mary* Errrr...just kidding! Heh heh...ouch.)
- School Day, by Chuck Berry
-----Ever sat in school and wondered if there was an oldies for the occaison? Of course you have! And if not, see THE THEORY! Well, here it is. Although all of Chuck Berry's songs are basically the same, this has the best lyrics, and sort of hits home (especially when you're sitting in English, and it gets stuck in your head)
- If You Wanna Be Happy, by Jimmy Soul
-----Just a fun song. Sexist, but fun.
- Sounds of Silence, by Simon & Garfunkal
-----Deep, disturbing, delightful. This song is another well known hit, but is just angst-y enough for our tastes ("I Am A Rock" is too angst-y. A great song, but...). It makes great going to sleep to music too.
- The Boxer, by Simon & Garfunkal
-----A much less known song, but ten times as gorgeous. Simon & Garfunkal do their patented job of blending melody and harmony in this song, from the simple but meaningful lyrics to the la la la's.
- I Get By, With a Little Help From my Friends, by The Beatles
-----Well, you knew they would show up somewhere on this list...(Mary sez: Just thank heavens we avoided Elvis. What is the big deal with him anyway? He is quite dead, thankyouverymuch! Brandie sez: Hey, I happen to like Elvis. Most of his songs are really good.) But we're off the topic, this is a fun song, known to most as "That song from 'The Wonder Years'"
- Brandie, by Barry Mantilow
-----A loverly song featuring none other than our very own Brandie! But that is only one of the reasons it got on to the list. The others are...umm...well, it's a cool song! Deal!
- Drift Away, by Doby Gray
We'd like to thank Richard Ross for mailing us the title and artist. Join our singing! We'll just sing away! HEY COME BACK! Oh well. "Gimme the beat boys, and free my soul, I wanna get lost in your rock 'n' roll and drift away. Yeah! Gimme the beat boys, and free my soul, I wanna get lost in your rock 'n' roll and drift away."
Brandie and Mary (that would be us) have a serious theory about life. Now, sophmore year at our high school, we are forced to discover what it means to be human:
This has nothing to do with the true mystery of life.
Then, if you will be kind enough to read "The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy" by Douglas Adams, you will learn that the answer to life, the universe, and everything, is 42.
Close, but no cigar.
After discovering 42, it is suggested that we, as intelligent life everywhere, do not truly comprehend the question. Continuing the Hitch Hiker's inaptly named trilogy to "Life, The Universe, and Everything" you will be surprised to learn that the question of the mystery of life is "What is six multiplied by nine?"
Poor, deluded Mr. Adams. While he writes wonderful books, he is unwittingly confusing thousands, if not millions, of people and leading them astray from our true purpose on this Earth. Now, you may say that we (Brandie and Mary) are wrong. You may say we (Mary and Brandie) are obsessive. Even a few sandwiches short of...of...a few sandwiches in a basket. BUT, here is our theory. Laugh if you will, but we have seen it work too many times to doubt it.
For every possible situation or event, there is an oldies song or slight variation on one to fit the situation
Not quite what you were expecting was it? Not good enough for you? Hmmm? What did you expect, some crap like the Golden Rule? Sheesh, we're teenaged girls, but we're not quite angst-y enough to get that deep! Gees...expecting to get the mystery of life of a web page...probably fell for that Heaven's Gate crap too...
Also, before you laugh and scoff at our Theory too much, please remember the following restrictions:
Thank you for your time! Please, send us any comments, questions, or large sums of money using the e-mail addresses below! Just pick one...
- Looking for a situation will not work. The Theory deals with spontaneous outbursts only.
- It is our humble duty on this Earth to listen to as many oldies as possible in order to increase this frequency.
- The Theory works best if you have someone else to share them with, or better yet, a psychic mind link with them (Trust us on this one...)
- If absolutely neccessary, you may use a song from another time period to fit the rule. But it must be obscure.
E-mail Mary at school or at home, depending on the time of year you read this.
E-mail Brandie at school.
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